Sore & itchy

Ok, this is probably too much information for you but ever since I got back from Blackpool I've been having skin problems. First up was a very itchy rash on my left side just where my bra goes. Pink and swollen (oo-er) but not spotty. I looked it up on NHS Direct but couldn't figure out what it was. Probably contact dermatitis or something. AFAIK I haven't come into contact with anything I might be allergic to. The washing liquid is the same stuff we always use. Anyways, I've also had a similar reaction in a slightly more awkward/embarrassing place that I won't go into here except to say that there's no way its an STD ok!? Been feeling generally itchy on my scalp & various bits of my anatomy. Today I went for a job interview & wore some shoes that I haven't had on in ages & were killing me by the time I got home. I threw the damn things off only to get a very sore & itchy lump on the top of my left foot. The balls of my feet feel very swollen & lumpy too & now I've got a maddening itch on my right side where the waistband of my trousers is. Its the same M.O. every time - red, lumpy, warm & itchy. I'm wondering if its the new shower gel I tried on Sunday morning. I got a travel size bergamot & something from Boots as I'd run out of the usual stuff. But why didn't I just get a rash straight away? Why is it coming in drips & drabs? What the hell is wrong with me? Was it something at the hotel? Is it some other health problem entirely?

WHAT THE FUCK IS IT???